April 29, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Expedia customer service

James Callan writes:

My wife and I wanted to travel to Chicago from Seattle with our new daughter. I visited Expedia, picked the dates I wanted, chose Alaska as the carrier I wanted to use, and then selected my departure flight, Alaska flight 28.

After I selected my departure flight, I selected my return flight, Alaska flight 23.

After I picked my return flight, Alaska 23, this screen showed up: "Flights Cannot Be Ticketed Together."

I didn't understand why the flights I selected couldn't be ticketed together. The two flights I selected were operated by the same airline. Both were Alaska Airlines flights, which I even confirmed on Alaskaair.com.

So, I called Expedia's customer service line.

Second thing broken: I ended spending half an hour on the phone.

Third thing broken: when the agent offered to sell me these tickets, I was told "the price just changed," the tickets were now $50 more than they were on Expedia's website. When I asked to talk to a supervisor, he said the same thing. He also mentioned, (in passing), that the reason for the "Flights Cannot be Ticketed Together" error message was because we were trying to buy a seat for my infant daughter, along with our tickets.

Does "Flights Cannot be Ticketed Together" give any clue that the infant ticket is preventing us from buying our tickets together?

No.

Does the error message urge you to call customer service?

No.

Expedia's customer service agent basically said I could buy tickets from them or from someone else. They also said they couldn't sell me tickets for the price on the website because "the price is not confirmed until you purchase the tickets."

I asked the supervisor, "What about the fact that Expedia's own website wouldn't sell me the tickets?" The supervisor's response to my question was, "Not my problem."

My opinion of Expedia during this experience went from highly favorable to probably never doing business with them again.

April 28, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Salad type

I decided not to order the "large masculine" salad.

April 27, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Keyboard buttons

Hanan Cohen points out:

The power, wake and sleep keys are pretty important to access. Couldn't the product designers find a better placement for those keys?

April 26, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Comcast Internet automated help

Jason Beardslee writes in:

This is the actual conversation I had with the Comcast internet automated help console.  I tried to use it thinking (wrongly, of course) that it was an email based suggestion submission.  When I got the first response back I decided to see what it would respond with if I typed in random statements.  The result was very funny.

Comcast help:

Hello! I'm Ask Comcast, an interactive agent available 24/7 to answer questions about your Comcast High Speed Internet and Cable TV services.

You can ask me things like:

    "I lost my password, what should I do?"
    "How do I set up my e-mail?"
    "How do I create another e-mail address?"
    "What's my cable TV channel lineup?"
    "What is HDTV?"

Type your question or topic in the space below and click SEND.

Me:

The channel lineup page is mind numbingly slow. Fix it please.

Comcast help:

Finding Your Channel Lineup

To find your channel lineup:
Step 1: Go to the Comcast.net home page
Step 2: Click on the TV Listings link in the bottom right-hand column of the
home page
Step 3: Enter your zip code and select your local area if prompted. You will
be able to view the details of your channel lineup.

Me:

I hate comcast.

Comcast help:

OK, don't get frustrated. Type your question and I'll do my best to answer.

Here are the areas I can help you with:

 1 E-mail
 2 Browser
 3 Comcast.net Web Site
 4 Account Management
 5 Online Security
 6 Computer Setup
 7 Comcast High-Speed Internet Features And Services

Make a selection by typing a number or type more for more options.

Me:

I'm getting DSL

Comcast help:

Transferring your Comcast service(s) to a new address

To move your service to a new location, simply determine if your new address
is in an area serviced by Comcast. To do so, enter your new address in our
Service Availability Locator. If we find a match in our system, you'll be
localized to your new neighborhood or asked to pick a neighborhood from a
short list. Then all you need to do is call 1-800-COMCAST two to four weeks
before your move to schedule your installation and disconnection
appointments.

Me:

[...@#$)#(@*$...]

Comcast help:

That's some interesting language.

If you need help with anything, type a question or type ? to see what I can do.

Me:

I'm not frustrated, you're just a stupid thing that can't help!!!!!

Comcast help:

I don't come from are a stupid thing that can not help!!!!!. I'm from Philadelphia, PA!

Me:

Why does my internet stop working whenever it rains, snows, or the wind blows?

Comcast help:

I'm sorry, it's hard to tell what you mean by long messages like that.

Please type a shorter message addressing a specific topic.

If you are having difficulty finding the answer to your question, you can chat with a live Technical Support Representative.

Me:

I'm glad my money is going to something sooo useful!

Comcast help:

Goodbye!

April 25, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Parking meter

I was amused by this parking meter, whose awful design optimistically invites a "smart card" (see upper left).

Note all the instructions and some bonus graffiti.

April 24, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Envision LCD monitor

Paul Schreiber points out:

This Envision LCD monitor pivots from portrait to landscape. However, it has storage cups on the side so when you pivot it, all your stuff in the cup holders falls out, unless you take the time to remove everything from the cup holders every time you switch the monitor orientation.

April 22, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: 'Spam' side effect in Gmail

Alexander Benenson writes in:

Google's Gmail shows ads based on keywords in the message you’re viewing. Apparently even if you aren’t viewing a message, Gmail will still try to show something related to what you’re looking at.

In this example, even though my Spam folder is empty, Google helpfully shows me a recipe for Spam, presumably because the folder I’m viewing is called “Spam." I think this gives Spam (the food) an unfair advantage, since the folder name “Spam” is pre-defined by Google.

Maybe they should let users change the “Spam” folder name to some other processed foodstuff?

[Note the category of this post... yes, we know it's all in good fun :)  -mh]

April 21, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Car gas cap door

For several minutes at the gas station I was totally stumped by this rental car. How do you open the gas cap door? Pressing anywhere in the handle had no effect whatsoever.

I finally discovered the trick: press your finger exactly in the seam on the right-hand side and it will open. Press anywhere but that exact location, and the door won't budge.

Here's the not broken design, from a different rental car: this is how all gas-cap doors should be designed. Elegant and easy to use.

April 20, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Belkin optical mouse

Michael Witt points out:

The box that this Belkin mouse is packaged in has a warning label that says:

Warning

This product contains chemicals, including lead, known to the state of California to cause birth defects and other reproductive harm.

Wash hands after handling.

"Wash hands after handling"?? It's a mouse!

April 19, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Rental car keys

A reader named Eugene writes in:

When I rented a car on my last vacation, I got two keys. Great idea - keep one in your pocket and use the other to prevent yourself from getting locked out, right?

Wrong!

I asked the agent, "What is the point is of getting two keys if I can't separate them?" She just shrugged and said, "I don't know."

Then the other agent behind the counter said, "You can try to separate them if you want to, but I'm not sure what will happen if you return keys that are separated or reattached in a different manner."

So much for having a spare key in a separate location...

April 18, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Rite Aid slogan

Rite-Aid's slogan is broken: "With us, it's personal."

Isn't that a bit aggressive?

April 17, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Illness sign

Jeff Russell asks if it's really necessary for the sign to be so explicit. After all, it's posted in full view of customers who could be ordering food.

April 15, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Microsoft Access Visual Basic editor help

Florent Burroni writes:

I pushed the F1 button while working with Microsoft Access Visual Basic Editor, and I got this message:

Then, what was really wonderful was that when I press the Help button of the pop up message above, I got the message below:

April 14, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Emergency exit

A reader submits a picture taken in Fort Lauderdale, Florida:

At the Broward Convention Center, I noticed this Emergency Exit sign posted between two water fountains on the side of the restroom entrance and 100 feet from the nearest real exit.

If I had strength like the Incredible Hulk I could break through the wall in a pinch...

April 13, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: (Just for fun) Baby-chick egg

From the excellent site cuteoverload.com:

This reminded me of the This is Broken logo.

April 12, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Waiting room rules

Josh Zerin points writes:

While waiting to take a drug test, I noticed this sign in the waiting room that states

Please

No Eating
No Drinking

In this area

However, the receptionist offers you a glass of water (which you are apparently not allowed to drink) while you're waiting.

April 11, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Acura navigation system interface

I counted 15 interface elements - buttons on- and off-screen - in this Acura Navigation System.

Is that really safe for the driver to try to operate at 60 MPH? (And yes, despite any on-screen warnings, of course they will operate it while driving.)

April 10, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: U.S. Marshal scanned stamp

This was "scanned" by the US Marshals. Wink wink. If you know what we mean.

(Why use quotes around "scanned"? Wasn't it just... scanned?)

April 8, 2006 09:01 AM

Broken: Many infomercials

Many infomercials are scams. (Shocking, I know.)

From Words to Live By in Infomercial World: Caveat Emptor - New York Times:

Somehow the producers of infomercials make it work. Those trying to warn consumers about the possible pitfalls have a much harder time of it. The Federal Trade Commission issues a constant stream of warnings at www.ftc.gov/ftc/consumer.htm against belts that twitch your abdominal muscles and no-money-down real estate seminars that promise riches. Of course, hundreds of people have to be duped before a product is cited there.

Broken: LinkedIn account cancellation policy

Robert Glazer points out:

You can sign up for LinkedIn via an online form, but if you want to cancel your account you have to call or postal-mail them.

April 7, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Marriott Monterey linen change card

At the Marriott Monterey...

... the only way I can finagle new sheets every day, in this $200+/night hotel, is to

(a) read the card and
(b) remember to put the card on my pillow every morning.

Otherwise they reserve the right to give me the same sheets each day.

(If they're saving water as a result, shouldn't they give me a price break?)

April 6, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Linda McCartney pizza box

Ben Tweed writes in:

I took this Linda McCartney pizza out of the freezer to microwave it. I looked at the side panel for the microwaving instructions, which were nothing out of the ordinary, right down to having to put the pizza on a specialized tray.

I opened the box and shook it, removing its contents - the plastic wrapped pizza and not the aforementioned tray. I peered into the box to see if it had stuck to the inside. No go. I checked to see if it was somehow hidden in between the layers of cardboard on one of the side panels of the box. Also a no go. This has happened to me again once already since then, proving this not a mistake on a single box, but a complete design flaw.

Upon discovering that there was in fact no silver disc, I decided to microwave it on a plain glass plate instead, and it came out fine.

Why refer to something on your packaging that is supposedly needed for successful microwaving of the product that is not in the box and actually unnecessary in the first place?

April 5, 2006 08:47 AM

Broken: English spelling

Do you know why there are no spelling bees in Spain? Because Spanish is spelled just like it sounds. It's English that is so hard to spell.

Thus, I give you: Poems showing the absurdities of English spelling.

Are there spelling bees in other languages? I haven't heard of any.

(Of course, despite the difficulties of English, I think it's totally broken not to learn how to spell properly.)

(Thanks, BB)

Broken: Organic cereal name

For some reason I find this to be one of the dumbest cereal gimmicks I've ever seen: that's right, you're eating Zen. Not just any Zen, but "optimum Zen."

Uhhh... what?

April 4, 2006 08:40 AM

Broken: Amazon sports e-mail

Seth posted a bulk e-mail he got from Amazon:

Subject: [placeholder for winning team] Wins the NCAA Tournament

Dear Amazon.com Customer,

Congratulations, [placeholder for winning team]! As someone who has purchased...

See the original post: Go Placeholders!! Defense, defense.

Broken: Faux-Chinese tattoos

The New York Times reports that many Chinese character tattoos, although fashionable, don't actually mean anything. (Shocking, I know.)

From Cool Tat, Too Bad It's Gibberish:

Christina Norton of Redondo Beach, Calif., is also getting her tattoo lasered off. At the tattoo parlor, "I asked the guy, 'Are you sure?' " Ms. Norton recalled. "He assured me, so then I went ahead and did it." Now she knows that her tattoo is meaningless out of context with other characters. "Ever since I found out, I was like, I have to get it off," she said.

Also see hanzismatter.com.

Broken: Sushi promotion

50% off sushi every day? I'm not sure I want to eat there any day.

April 3, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: Parking sign instructions

I saw this sign in a parking lot...

... and was confused: no vehicles beyond the yellow line? What about parking inside it? (And what about those millions of vehicles beyond it? Isn't that a bit extreme to ban them all?)

April 1, 2006 12:03 AM

Broken: (new site name) This Is Broken In

I'm happy to announce that from now on, this site will be called "This Is Broken In."

We will only feature products like these chinos that are broken in.